Ps 23 - the well-know but misunderstood Psalm

Each verse, each instrument, blended into a symphony, a jazz band…

Lesson Seven

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures. He leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life . And I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

The disciple having been taken through all six verses by the Spirit of God has begun to live in spiritual maturity and fruitfulness. It is important to understand by ‘taken through by the Spirit of God’ we are not imagining an intellectual exercise as if discipleship is an academic process – as if reading these blogs and answering a ‘test’ leads to spiritual maturity!

Jesus put it like this: ‘When the Spirit comes, He will lead you into all the truth’.

Truth is something that we are led into, to experience as much as understand. The Psalmist put it like this ‘The entrance of Your word gives light; it gives understanding to the simple’ Ps 119v130. The word has to ‘enter’ us not just be true. It’s not enough to acknowledge the bible is the word of God, the word must be inscribed on our hearts by the Spirit of God. It’s not head knowledge.

The apostle John pictured the stages of spiritual maturity in three phases:

• I write to you, little children, because your sins are forgiven…you have known the Father

• I write to you, young men, because you are strong, the word abides in you and you have overcome the evil one

• I write to you, fathers, because you have known Him who is from the beginning

The parallels with ordinary physical life are easily understood, but it is important to realise that these phases are not time-related in quite the same fashion. For the disciples’ 1:1 time with Jesus it took approximately three years. By the time Peter stood up of the Day of Pentecost they had passed through each phase.

Stage One: Little Children, salvation and forgiveness

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures. He leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul:

When we initially yield our lives to Christ, He forgives our sins and restores our souls. A good picture is the returning prodigal son. It is a beautiful thing to realise that we have been forgiven, justified, acquitted, ransomed, redeemed, that we are clean in God’s sight and that He loves us as sons, just like He loves Jesus: ‘See what manner of love the Father has bestowed upon us that we should be called children of God’ 1 John 3v1

Stage Two: Young men, strong in the word and overcoming

He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

In this phase, we have moved out of the quiet waters, and the green pasture. We know the Lord is our shepherd and we are ready to face rougher terrain, the trials and tribulations of life, but we are not alone living by our own resources. Not only is the Lord with us but something very curious becomes our new normal, our new reality.

In the heat of the battle, we discover a new source of sustenance: the very words of God, like a celestial or heavenly food supply. We ‘know’ the truth of ‘Give us this day our daily bread’. Like Jesus who told His disciples at the well with the Samaritan woman, ‘My food is to do the will of Him who sent Me’. God had given Jesus what we might call a ‘word of knowledge’, God had revealed to Jesus, facts about the woman’s life, her marital status, and much else besides and Jesus passed it on to her. He had received the word and ministered it to the woman. We shouldn’t think of the banquet in the Psalm as either physical food or a theological degree, but , like Jesus with the woman, it is dynamic and life-giving. In Hebrews, we read that the ‘word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart’.

Equally, the disciple learns to operate with the same anointing as Christ. John the Baptist said ‘I baptise with water, but One is coming who will baptise you with the Holy Spirit’. The word for Christ is Messiah which means ‘anointed one’. True Christianity can only work if the disciple is baptised in the Spirit and is operating with the anointing of the Spirit. Until this is normal, we will limit our experience to kindergarten Christianity in Stage One.

Stage Three: Fathers

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, And I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

The distinction between a father and a young man is that children and young men left to their own devices are less likely to mature. In fact, many very young children will be led astray and perish.

That is true physically as it is spiritually. For young men, the temptation is to be convinced that now you have the celestial food supply and the anointing of the Spirit, you can go it alone, whereas fathers know that annoying though brothers and sisters can be it is important to remain together, and in contact with ‘fathers’. But the eventual aim is that ‘fatherhood is reached’. In John’s gospel he wrote that Jesus was ‘full of grace and truth’ and ‘of His fulness we all receive grace upon grace’. In terms of Ps 23 these are disciples who have never lost sight of the need for forgiveness and restoration, or the life-giving dual supply of Word and Spirit, but in everything, in every action and relationship and circumstance they minister from the fullness of grace and mercy.

It is important to note that not all fathers are apostles but all apostles, operating in their apostleship, must be fathers. During the first few days on Saul/Paul’s conversion on the Damascus Road Ananias gave Paul the word of God that he was to be an apostle. But on that day, he had simply been ‘born again’ he was a little child amazed at what he had discovered that God had forgiven him and loved him. He was ‘filled with the Spirit’ and began to learn a completely new way of dependence on God, living as he wrote later as a son of God ‘led by the Spirit’. Some years later he began to operate in his calling as an apostle. In the interim years he had matured and ministered as an apostle but also a father.

So, you may not be an apostle, or a prophet, or an evangelist, or a pastor, or a teacher (Ephesian 4) but you are a father. And others will recognise that. You know you don’t need a title! However your gifts and ministry are defined you know you abide in Him and you dwell in His house and that you minster to others from that perspective, grace and mercy flow through you to others and those who are ‘little children’ or ‘young men’ continue to grow and move forward in their giftings and callings simply by spending time with you.

A father will not be interested in forming you into their image, but they are able to say to you, as did Paul, ‘imitate me as I imitate Christ’. He was talking spiritually, not specifically. In other words, although he was called to be an apostle, he did not force Timothy, his ‘son in the faith’, into the same mold, but he did pass on to him his spiritual dynamic and discipline of hearing from God so that Timothy could fulfil his calling. A true father rejoices over your growth and maturity whatever your calling may be, just as a physical father releases his children to fulfil their potential whatever career/occupational path their choose.

‘Even if you have ten thousand teachers in Christ, you would not have many fathers but I became your father in Christ Jesus in the gospel’ 1 Cor 4v15

This is how the apostle Paul saw his relationship towards the church in Corinth. The earliest converts were due to his preaching and the church grew from that starting point. Although he came to then initially as an apostle, now he sees them more as his ‘children’ and ministers to them from that perspective. If you read 1 Corinthians, you will see that some of the serious pastoral issues in the church were the inevitable outcome of spiritual immaturity and that the solution Paul was urging was to go on to maturity, whatever the short-term disciplinary action was invoked.

‘I cannot speak to you as spiritual but as fleshly, as babies in Christ…for where there are divisions among you are you not fleshly and acting like mere men…’ 1 Cor 3 v 1 – 3

He says to them there are three types of me in terms of spiritual maturity

(i) Mere men – not born again, not forgiven, living life from their own resources

(ii) Fleshly believers – born again by the Spirit but not being led by the Spirit but by their own ability to think, feel and act

(iii) Spiritual – believers who have died to living from their own resources and live according to the Spirit, eating the celestial food and knowing the anointing of the Spirit

The spiritual believers are like those maturing through Stages 2 and 3 in John’s list – young men and fathers.

Concluding comments

How important it is to ‘go on to maturity’ - as the writer to Hebrews says.

All the verses of Ps 23 are simultaneously alive in someone who has matured. Each verse has become part of them i.e. the Holy Spirit has led that person into the truth of each verse. They know what it is to be restored, to walk in paths of righteousness, even under the shadow of death in its various forms, to feed on Him and know the reality of the anointing of the Holy Spirit. And they are filled continuously with fresh grace and mercy and each day know the One who is from the beginning because they live in His house.

And continues to do so, to mature, and grow in Christ, deepening their experience of the love of God in each circumstance however testing.

Spiritual MOT?

Periodically assessing where we are on the 1 John scale of maturity is a healthy exercise. Perhaps we should hand ourselves over to God once a year when we put our cars into the garage for an MOT?

Check one – forgiveness, any issues? Any advisories?

Check two – feasting and anointing? Oil change? Fresh anointing?

Check three – abiding in the house? Am I still deriving everything from Him?

Thank you for reading the Ps 23 series! God bless.

Shaving on a Saturday

To shave on a Saturday
This I will not do
I’d rather squat on a porcupine
Than edge my beard into a straight line
Even if Moses tells me to

No! I’d rather be circumcised
And on the Sabbath
Lift no heavy weights
Than smooth my stubble
With sharp blades, single or double

A day’s rest – I insist
Nocturnal and diurnal, joys of neglect
Free to grow, to flex, to sprout
To chatter to neighbours
Flout the razors and…drop out

But Sunday has come
And with it a fresh blade or two
Soap and towels – I’m feelings fresh
But shaving on a Saturday
This I will not do.

Psalm 23 - well known but misunderstood

Lesson Six

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever

After the activity of the shepherd leading his sheep across the hills and the strange battle scene in verse five, the final verse may appear to be an anticlimax, almost tame, in comparison with the action-packed first five verses.

There’s nothing wrong with a quiet ending of course, but it’s the abrupt shift from the battlefield feast and the unexpected anointing that takes us by surprise. Suddenly storm and tempest are replaced with a calm and sunny day, a few clouds drifting in an otherwise blue sky.

And the final line seems to follow a linear progression, the battle has ended, peace is restored, and he finds his way home, even if it is a house like no other house, considering who owns it.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life

A notable feature of nearly all the pastoral epistles in the New Testament, whether written by Peter, Paul, or John is the seemingly formal greeting, synonymous with our ‘Dear…’ in the opening paragraphs:

‘Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ’ Rom 1 v 7
‘Grace to you and peace be multiplied’ 1 Peter 1 v 2
‘Grace, mercy, and peace…from God the Father and …’ 2 John v3

But this is not a formality. One of the characteristics of an apostle – someone ‘sent’ (‘apostle’ means ‘sent one’) by Christ is that, upon arrival or via a letter, they convey a sense of grace, mercy, and peace. It is foundational. After the foundation has been established and renewed then the apostles move on to deal with any local problems and challenges.

Jesus did the same. Immediately after the resurrection, the scriptures tell us He appeared that evening to the disciples. There were approximately 120 disciples in Jerusalem at the time but we can safely assume that at least the eleven, and the women travelling with Jesus, including His mother, were present.

Jesus appears among them. They are terrified wondering if He is a ghost. His first words, the first words of the resurrection era were ‘Peace to you’. In part, of course, this is to deal with the disciples’ astonishment and fear, but there was also an elephant in the room: the men had failed to believe the women who had reported the resurrection to the men. Peace was the very thing that was absent in the room.

When Mary Magdalene and the others reported the resurrection to the men, Luke’s gospel tells us that ‘their words seemed to them to be old wives tales and they did not believe’.

Imagine the tension between the women who had witnessed the resurrected Jesus and the disbelieving male disciples. It was into this atmosphere that Jesus said ‘Peace to you’. Having appeared and proclaimed peace, He made his way over to the table where the disciples were sitting:

‘Later He appeared to the eleven as they sat at the table, and He rebuked their unbelief because they did not believe those who had seen Him’ Mark 16 v 14

In my imagination I see Peter, of course, standing up, and making his way across the room. There are tears streaming down the rough Galilean’s face as he embraces Mary Magdalene and apologises for not believing her. It sparks of a flurry of similar reconciliations. There are many tears. And peace is restored. The disciples are now ready for the next forty days, forty days that will change the world. The peace that Jesus wanted to bring as foundational to the next forty days before He ascended into heaven now existed and He could continue with his important work during those forty days.

There are tears streaming down the rough Galilean’s face as he embraces Mary Magdalene and apologises for not believing her.

St Paul greeted the Romans with grace, mercy, and peace before going on to deal principally with tensions that had arisen between Jewish and Gentile believers in the church in Rome. In Corinth he repeated the same patter: grace, mercy, and peace before tackling immorality in the church and other serious pastoral issues.

At whatever stage in our discipleship or spiritual maturity we need to be reminded that ‘we’ have not achieved anything, and even if we have been successful or ‘fruitful’, we did not earn God’s love, his favour, or his blessing. We are not, as Paul wrote, ‘under law’, attempting to impress God by our obedience or righteousness. We are, in fact ‘under grace’. Grace is freely given on the basis of faith not our ‘works’. The word charis or grace means a gift that is freely given. To receive it all we can do is believe it is for us and open our hands and take it with thanks. Mercy is ‘undeserved kindness’ and foundational. We receive it and pass it on to everyone we meet. And peace. We have peace with God not because we have meditated away our troubles, or have avoided sin for a few days, or we have taken a break from too busy a schedule and are lying on a sun-soaked beach. Meditation, doing good not evil, and a good work-life balance are all beneficial but our peace with God is due entirely, as with grace and mercy, to Christ and what His death and resurrection achieved on our behalf:

‘Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful’ John 14v27

‘Having been justified by faith we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ’ Rom 5v1

‘For He Himself is our peace…’ Eph 2 v 14

We can only pass on what we first receive. This disciple has, like a sheep, followed the shepherd through all kinds of terrain and conditions in life. And there have been some battles along the way. But the idea is that whatever we pass through grace and mercy are right behind us, ready with fresh supplies.

And I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

Our final phrase. Ignoring the future tense for the time being the setting sounds more like a beginning, doesn’t it? Often on meeting someone we soon get round to asking: ‘What do you do?’ and ‘Where do you live?’ Applying that to Ps 23 and the answer might be ‘O I am just a sheep, you know, one of the flock’. And then ‘I don’t own my house, but it’s mine nonetheless to live in. It’s the shepherd’s house’.

This house is not one that we visit at the end of our apprenticeship, as if we have ’graduated’ or finally passed the test and finally can be admitted. Neither is it referring to the end of our life and resurrection in heaven. It is referring to our present address. The future tense stresses the permanence ‘forever’ not that it is a future address to move into. It’s saying, ‘I might not own the house, it will always be the house of the Lord, but neither do I pay rent, and, no, there’s nothing I can do that will get me evicted’, this is my permanent address, I live here. In fact, it may sound strange, but I don’t ever leave the house, we travel together, I’m part of the house, it’s a living house and it’s on the move.

Jesus put it like this:

‘I am the true vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in Him, bears much fruit: without Me you can do nothing’ John 15 v 5

Peter, the apostle to whom Jesus commanded to ‘feed My sheep’ expressed it like this:

‘Coming to Him, a living stone, rejected indeed by men, but chosen by God and precious, you also, as living stones, are being built up, a spiritual house…’ 1 Pet 2 v 4,5

Final Comment

In the words of T S Eliot’s poem East Coker ‘In my beginning is my end’.

And now, perhaps we ‘see it’, that as informative as the linear approach to this Psalm can be, once the disciple has been fully formed, he or she will have the whole Psalm alive and well living inside like an internal orchestra with each verse playing along but at any one moment maybe one or two stepping forward and playing a wonderful solo through your soul at any one time.

Running - actually a ‘not running’ blog 28th August

It’s walking boots not trainers for September

• Big decision: Abandon running ‘til October

• Why? Achilles

Welcome to the Stevens’ September Challenge

1. Morning Pilates – home-made version

2. Walk – at least 45’ but at least one 2-hour walk per week

3. Stairs – at least 20 up & downs + 1 x 100 up & down by end of September*

4. Others – an every-other-day smorgasbord

*The equivalent of climbing Mount Snowdon is approx 400 ups and downs - attempt sometime in 2023

October – tentative return to running: build up from 30” run + 1’ walk back to 4 x 5K (November) then 1 x 10K (December)

That’s the plan.

Being Half-American/ Half-Brit I’m torn between ‘Go for it!’ and ‘Believe it when I see it, John’

At least I have three days left in August to delete/edit this post and claim you only imagined reading it if you mention it in the future.

Psalm 23 - a well-known but misunderstood Psalm (v)

Lesson Five

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies:

Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

Moving from the relatively safety and comfort of verses one to four into verse five is a huge metaphorical shift. The song has changed key. If it was a play, the lights have dimmed only to come up again for the audience to see a whole new set: the pastoral scene of a Shepherd and his sheep is packed away, and now the lights have come up on a battleground.

The shepherd has discarded his staff and rod; he is now a battle commander, but even this metaphor is insufficient to cover the shift which so rapidly takes on ‘other-worldly’ characteristics. I can imagine C S Lewis enjoying this verse immensely; by the time we have finished we’ve passed through the wardrobe from this world into Narnia where nothing is quite the same. In fact, Narnia represents a greater reality, not a dreamworld…or a hallucination.

It wouldn’t be ridiculous to speculate whether David as the lyricist or the sheep in the Psalm hasn’t happened upon some particularly nourishing mushrooms.

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Imagine a hillside. It’s a medieval battle scene. There are lancers, horses, archers, soldiers with swords and shields. You have just arrived, and the Commander says, ‘Follow me!’. He walks out between the opposing forces and sets up a trestle table in the middle of the field. A tablecloth next followed by a sparklingly clean wine glass and a pleasant red to swirl, whilst reading the extensive menu. He invites you to sit down. The battle continues to rage around you. A feast is delivered, and you tuck in.

That’s the picture of this verse. It almost feels like we have entered into a fairy story, where it’s just as likely that leprechauns chatter away, or unicorns appear out of the mist. Nothing quite matches the world we knew. Is this real?

And then the Commander stands behind you and pours over your head some anointing oil ‘Thou anointest my head with oil’ and he doesn’t stop. He keeps pouring until ‘my cup overflows’. The anointing doesn’t stop. It’s all over the table, the food, everything is anointed.

We can barely remember the metaphor of sheep with a shepherd. And even the figurative battle commander seems to be blurred by the unexpected meal and anointing. We seem to be in a different realm, a new normal. Can we make sense of this?

One way of interpreting Psalm 23 is to say it is Messianic, ‘prophetic’, describing ahead of time, the coming Messiah (Hebrew, translated Christ in Greek). Messiah means: ‘anointed one’. In the Old Testament the anointing was restricted to Kings, prophets and priests. But the prophets, including David, looked ahead for the emergence of THE Messiah who would be King, prophet, and priest in one person. In other words, Ps 23 can be thought of as a prophetic Psalm containing the yearning of David for the coming One who would be called the Son of David, the Messiah, Jesus.

David was singing from his own experience of course. The prophet Samuel had found David and anointed him to be king of Israel even though he was the youngest son of Jesse: ‘Then Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed David in the midst of his brothers: and the Spirit of the Lord came upon him from that day forward.’ 1 Samuel 16 v 13

The anointing transported David from the very earthly realm of being a shepherd with his father’s sheep in the hills, fighting off wild animals attacking the sheep, into the realm of the Spirit. Of God. This is what we are dealing with in verse five. We have moved from earth to heaven. No one has died and ‘gone to heaven’. What we see in David is a man on Earth who is anointed with the Holy Spirit, connected to both realms simultaneously, like Jesus who was to come.

When the disciples asked Jesus about prayer he said ‘thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven’. This is the new normal. Made possible by the anointing.

If you want to play safe, you can leave the interpretation of this verse as applying to David and/or the Messiah Jesus (‘Christ’ being the Greek translation of the Hebrew ‘Messiah’ which means anointed one). But we cannot. If the preceding verses are taken as relevant for us, so is verse five.

This is to be our new normal. The New Testament describes Christian believers as being ‘in Christ’. Water baptism is a remarkable sacrament and illustrates for us what God has done plunging us, immersing us, baptising us in His Son, Christ Jesus.

Jesus spoke of another baptism not with water but the Spirit: ‘John truly baptised with water but you shall be baptised with the Holy Spirit…you shall receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you…’ Acts 1 v 5,8 John the Baptist had prophesied that whilst he baptised with water there was coming ‘One who would baptise with the Holy Spirit…’

___________________________

It is worth stopping for a moment and catching our breath. So much has changed in the space of one verse.

We are looking at Psalm 23 ‘linearly’, verse by verse, as a ‘discipleship course’ of a number of lessons. Each one is a prerequisite of the next. You can’t be led until you have lied down. You can’t face the valley of the shadow of death until your soul has been restored, and you can’t enter the reality of verse five, of the realm of the Spirit, until you, like the disciples of Jesus, have left everything to follow Him.

The new normal looks like this.

You have enemies, who will attack and attempt to prevent you from doing what God is leading you into. But, instead of tensing and ‘girding up your loins’ God tells you to sit down and tuck into a good meal. Let the battle rage all around you, but first, enjoy a feast. So unexpected.

In other words, the answer is not activity, or more ‘ministry’ but to eat. Jesus said ‘I am the bread of life’. Just like the first lesson for the sheep was to ‘lie down’ now we have to learn to ‘sit down’ and eat, to feast on Him.

The second requirement is for this Messiah-consuming believer to be anointed with the Spirit. This isn’t a dab of perfume, this is a deluge of God Himself. The new normal is living an earthly life with a heavenly anointing, just like David. Just like Jesus. That is Christianity, normal Christianity.

To close this post let us return to the verse in 1 Samuel: ‘Then Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed David in the midst of his brothers: and the Spirit of the Lord came upon him from that day forward.’

If we are to be true disciples, the words ‘from that day forward’ are to become our story as well, not locked away in the bible, or some intellectual closet, or even ‘in church’, whether Pentecostal, or a ‘charismatic’ church. For David, as he grew into the anointing, he gradually fulfilled all that God has anointed him for, despite some notable setbacks.

Rusty bikes and Fine Wine

If you can drive or play a piano or do more or less anything that requires one hand knowing what the other is doing…read on. Here it’s driving two metaphors for the price of one.

I grew up living in a house two streets behind a beach. I also grew up in an era when cars, motorbikes, and bikes had a great deal of chrome-covered external steel components like bumpers, wheels, and handlebars.

The combination of the above meant that gallons of rust-removing pink fluid were sold annually to the good citizens of Whitstable and millions of others living close to the sea. The salt content in the moist air acting as an annoying catalyst for the complex electrochemical process colloquially known as ‘rusting’.

Every ten-year-old boy, seventeen-year-old boy racer, and more mature car owners would be seen ridding their cars and bikes of the rust that had accumulated over the previous weeks and months. Armed with rags, toothbrushes, and maybe sand-paper in dire circumstances. Holes were filled with paste, glass-fibre replaced rotting metal, exhausts were wrapped in metal tape; the war with rust continued both sides scoring victories as each year progressed.

Why indulge in this reminiscence?

It’s not just cars that rust, it’s us. People. Individuals.

Having moved inland away from the sea and now that many of the external chrome has been replaced on cars and bikes, it is less common to see rust. One Saturday morning I was working away in the front garden when a lad rode his bike past on the pavement. In fact, I heard him coming before I saw him. His bike was squeaking. As he worked his way past, I could see why; his wheels, but more importantly, his chain, was very rusty.

So, I stopped him. We chatted about his bike and the rust. He’d never bothered to look after his bike. I offered to get some oil for his chain. He couldn’t quite figure out why I should want to help but, without much comment, he said ‘Alrite’ and stayed in front of the house. I went into the garage and came back with a can of WD-40 and some chain-lube. I’m not a bike mechanic but I flipped his bike over and worked on the chain and the gears. Then noticed his brakes were worn down and the tyres flat. I pumped up his tyres but didn’t have any replacement bike pads. He still had rusty wheels and needed new brake pads but when he tried riding his bike with a lubricated chain and inflated tyres, he could hardly believe the difference. No more struggle. It was easy. A grunt and a half-smile were his ways of saying thank you and on he went, quieter, and faster.

It made me feel happy at the time but now I see the whole thing differently.

The boy’s bike did not become rusty overnight. For weeks after he had the bike for the first time it was rust-free. He might even have left it well it fell, outside, picked it up in the morning, and rode around carefree. Sometime later, however, the first signs of rust appeared on the handlebars and maybe the wheels. But the bike did not feel any different to ride that the day before and so it went on; the bike never feeling different from the day before. Without realising it, however, he as having to put a great deal more effort into pushing the pedals than he did at the start when it was new.

You’re a worship leader. Or you’re a preacher, or a writer, or a scientist, or a midwife, or a financial advisor, or a personal trainer and so on. Or a sommelier, of course.

And you sit back one day and realise that you’re working so much harder now than you did a year or so ago to get the same results. In fact, it’s all hard work. The joy has gone. The joy that fuelled your occupation is now a minor and transitory offshoot of all you do.

What has happened? You neglected yourself. Or you can think of it as the opposite of neglect! Once we’re ‘born again’ by the Spirit of God we are to ‘led by the Spirit’. Neglecting this means we have switched or reverted to a different operating system, ourselves. We attempt to run the show, to live the Christian life independent of the indwelling Christ. In biblical terminology that is the ‘living in the flesh’. It doesn’t mean out and out sin, it means you have become Lord, despite your profession that Jesus is Lord. You might be doing any number of ‘good’ things but they are all dead works. You have switched from the Holy Spirit to relying on your mind or your emotions or your willpower. Today appears to be very much like yesterday, and it is. But incrementally you have neglected ‘walking in the Spirit.’ Your inner man, your soul, and even your body, have become rusty and now you have to put in so much effort for the same results. It’s exhausting. And it will end in tears.

What to do?

And here we switch metaphors. Jesus spoke of a vine. He said ‘I am the vine and you are the branches. My father is a gardener. He will prune a fruit-bearing branch to produce more fruit. Or, if there’s no fruit, the branch will be cut off and thrown into the fire.’

Either way, the gardener will appear with a knife.

One of my holiday jobs many years ago was working on an apple orchard. And that is exactly what we did. Sometimes we pruned branches that were loaded with apples but blocked the light and took up too much energy from the tree, so the fruit was numerous but small and low quality. At other times, whole branches were removed that were not bearing fruit.

So, first, we have to realise what has happened. And be honest about where we are. How rusty we have become or our state as a branch. Is this a sign that there is a need to ‘die to’ whatever we are doing and move on to something fresh? It’s not bearing fruit anymore. Or whether of needing to be pruned so that there’s more energy to renew the joy in what we are doing. Let the gardener do His work.

In spiritual terms, it’s coming back to God and yielding everything. Laying everything at His feet. Thanking Him for everything that He has given you up to this point. Including the endless supply, the baptism, in the Spirit. Or asking for that gift for the very first time. It all starts with the pouring out of the Holy Spirit into a vessel yielded in faith and trust to God. What happens after that is unknown. It is the journey of faith, the Christ as you adventure through life. Maybe you will pick up your guitar again, if you are a worship leader, or you will preach again, or you will advise people again about their money, or you will return to work as a midwife, the activity is immaterial; the joy will again be central. The activity, an overflow of that joy. ‘Not by might, nor by strength, but by My Spirit.’

Maybe you will need to resign from your activity, or your role, not knowing exactly what lies ahead.

Back to the fine wine.

The purpose of a vineyard is to produce grapes and then wine. Not just quantity but quality. That’s the picture Jesus has about life, that He is producing fine wine through us, as us, in the world. We never stray too far from the first miracle recorded in John’s gospel, water into wine at a wedding. It’s just that now we are water pots in the hands of Jesus.

Psalm 23 misunderstood but well-known (iv)

Lesson Four

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

For those facing death this verse if often a great source of comfort, however, in terms of ‘discipleship’, we would be missing the point if we do not consider this verse in that context. Each verse is an important stepping stone towards spiritual maturity, and we have reached step four.

To recap:

• The disciple has, at some point, decided to follow the Lord and sees the Lord as their shepherd

• In encountering the Lord they encounter His love, peace, and priority: rest and the restoration of their souls

• Once established in peace and restored new paths of righteousness open up. The disciple may not realise it at this time but these paths are ‘for His sake’, there is a divine purpose at work. Dishonesty replaced with honesty. Courage instead of fear. Love instead of bitterness. The new paths may also have included ‘ministry’, for example preaching or healing or miracles or provision or mercy missions and so on. All this may continue to grow and prosper over months and years.

And then, unexpectedly, the disciple who has been enjoying a transformed life full of new paths, is plunged into the ‘valley of the shadow of death’. However it arrives, externally or through internal conflict, death stalks its prey. Everything that was a result of putting one’s faith in Christ fails or is set aside or fails to satisfy. You may be the victim of circumstances or the author of your own downfall, or simply responding to a strange call to die, but everything that has happened to this point is disintegrating or is taken away. Your taste buds have changed, whereas you looked forward to a fine latte or cappuccino at 11 every morning, now it has no pull. You feel lost.

Gone, it seems are the green pastures and the quiet waters. One’s soul is in anguish.

Everything, it seems, is a living contradiction. We feel as if we have been baptised into Christ’s cry on the cross ‘Eloi Eloi Sabachtani’, ‘My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?’ All is loss and darkness.

This is a severe test. And yet, a glimmer of light comes from that anguished Messianic cry. The disciple realises that, although Christ felt abandoned, He still addressed God with His abandonment. Although He felt abandoned, he did not abandon the Lord but cried out to Him.

If we equate the progression through Psalm 23 with the progression of thought through Paul’s epistle to the Romans you may have realised we have reached Romans 6 and 7, chapters that are rarely preached and taught. We prefer to skip Romans 6 and 7 and skip from Romans 5 straight to Romans 8. And no wonder.

Romans 6 is about our death. And Romans 7 is about divorce.

Like the discipleship program in Ps 23, which was going so well, Romans follows the same pattern.

By the end of Romans 5 believers have peace with God, justification, they have been transferred from Adam to Christ, and the Spirit is at work shedding abroad the love of God in their hearts. All is set fair.

Then Romans 6 ‘Do you not know that as many of us that were baptised into Christ have been baptised into His death? Knowing this that our old man was crucified?

And Romans 7 ‘You have died to the Law through the body of Christ, that you may be married to another – to Him who was raised from he dead, that we should bear fruit to God’

In the valley of the shadow of death we may have intellectually understood that we have had to ‘leave our nets’ to follow Christ i.e. leave our old lives behind, in the valley we progress to realising this death to the old ‘you’ is not something that has happened as a consequence of your commitment to Christ or your love for Christ. It is an historical fact. When Christ died we died.

We are now convinced throughout our being that we are dead and buried as far as our old selves and that our new identity is ‘in Christ’ so that, just as Jesus was raised, we can now be raised. This is not the final ‘resurrection’ but a here and now type of resurrection. Even in this ‘death valley’ we realise that God is at work, just as he was in Jesus after He had died and that new life will emerge from the wreckage, the death and destruction in the valley.

One last note. This experiential ‘death’ may be forced upon us by circumstance, or we may feel ‘called’ to it; like Jesus was called to Jerusalem.

In John’s gospel, when Jesus had reached Jerusalem and was days away from crucifixion He said ‘Truly I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies it remains alone, but if it dies, it produces much grain’

There is a purpose in this dying. It is to become more fruitful, but we must ‘die’ first. This death can be to die to whatever had been going so well. We can either resist, to switch to another parable and metaphor, the gardener’s knife or submit to some pruning.

John Mark Comer is a well-known American Christian writer (The Elimination of Hurry) and was the overall leader of a ‘mega-church’ a multi-site church of thousands attending each Sunday. This is his story:

“I was the co-planter then I became lead pastor when I was 28. We grew by about 1,000 people a year, for seven years straight. It was this wild ride – exhausting – wake up in the morning and work until I couldn’t move anymore.

We were successful on the outside by the American megachurch metrics. But on the inside, I was dying. At one point we had 93 people on staff – that’s not a pastor, that’s an executive director of a non-profit; it’s not what God made me to do! I had to learn the hard way that I’m a human being; I’m not a machine.

So I demoted myself, stepped down from leading our little family of churches, asked if I could just lead our one in the city. That was three and a half years ago, and I have not looked back. It’s been life-changing.”

It may appear to be ‘evil’ but we do not fear because, despite our feelings indicating differently, the Lord is with us. It is all part of discipleship.

Remember Peter. He had known Jesus’s love and friendship. Had participated in Christ’s miracle ministry, had seen the sick healed, the dead come back to life, the possessed set free and so on but then he denied Christ three times, and wept bitterly.

The valley of the shadow of death is full of weeping.

But then Jesus found Peter and asked him three times whether Peter loved Him. From the depths Peter answered, ‘You know that I love you’. Despite his failure, his love and faith in Christ had not been destroyed, only his misplaced confidence in Himself.

Next week: we find out what is the other side of the valley of the shadow of death. In terms of Romans, what is beyond chapters 6 and 7.

Running Blog - 15th August 2022

Paris 24 – reduced to walking

Sadly, having stopped running due to a bad back, then Covid, followed by headbutting the pavement whilst on a ‘recovery’ run, my left Achilles decided to reduce my chances of achieving the qualification time for Paris ‘24 even further.

Reduced to hobbling despite ice-packs daily and Ibuprofen I have been well and truly humbled. The thing is ‘we’ that is, I, carry around in my innermost some competing wisdoms which occasionally have a punch up with only one winner. In my case, in the blue corner, stands ‘Regular Exercise’ and in the red Corner ‘If it Hurts Stop’.

Boots not trainers for a while

Round One: Regular Exercise comes out swinging but I’m afraid when If It Hurts Stop lands a few jabs and maybe a nasty uppercut and Regular Exercise is down for a count, he gets up and carries on, despite his corner yelling and throwing towels around. That third voice is ignored and Boom! Knock-out follows on like night after day.

A week later and my training plan has been rewritten. I’m not going to return to running for a month…at least. But I am going to walk. Yesterday was the first pain-free day so up and out for an hour’s stroll round Blaise. The hills of South Wales will have to wait. Patience.

Today up and out round Blaise. A slightly hillier version and the intention is to do that twice today. And so on, building up until I can’t stand it anymore and break into a trot, a canter, and…well I’ll be happy to canter.

Just a fallen log. Dusty orange colour in early morning light not quite captured but it made me stop and stare

Today’s wander was accompanied by Rob Bell’s podcast No Tangents. He’s exhausting! How can anyone talk so fast about so many topics? I doubt he would like to be walking at my relaxed pace. Halfway through he stopped. Abruptly. I fished my iPhone out of my pocket to see why only to find myself staring at Mark Knopfler and Eric Clapton about to launch into Can’t Find My Way Home. So, for five minutes, strolling through the woods, I was carried along by the two guitar masters blending their art before returning to Rob Bell.

Not a bad way to start the day.

We Make the Road by Walking: Brian Maclaren

Opening comments

This review comes fairly hard on the heels of reviewing Richard Rohr’s Falling Upward and I suspect that for many these two authors, Rohr and Maclaren, and few others, Rob Bell, for example, are swimming in the same theological current.

Not that that current is easily defined. All three would be at pains to say (I feel): ‘If so, it’s in the context of the whole river which carries many Christian traditions along with our present understanding’.

Whether true or not, their books, seminars, and conferences are extremely popular. If they’re not riding around in a Porsche or a Lamborghini, no doubt they could be.

But the point of a review is not to promote but to reflect on the contents.

We Make the Road by Walking consists of 52 short chapters divided into four sections so that a small group can use it over the course of a year. At the end of each section, there is a page of directed reflection ideas to stimulate group discussion.

Confession: after a while, I rather skim-read certain sections. The main arguments had been made, perhaps, and some chapters had less depth. I apologise if my comments are therefore somewhat unfair due to my lack of attention.

Reading with a Green Pen: I note good points and not-so-good and neutral with a green pen. Before we get going you may be interested to know that I have 10 not so good green pen marks and 6 on the good side, but one of those is whole chapter.

Premise

Maclaren’s premise is that the scriptures that are translated ‘eternal life’ or ‘abundant life’ in John’s gospel can be rendered ‘true aliveness’. This is to redirect some who may mistakenly view ‘eternal life’ starting ‘in heaven once we die and have been resurrected’. Maclaren is a ‘now’ and ‘then’ believer. (See footnote page xiv)

And that we can only know this true aliveness when we, or as we, imitate Jesus and follow His teaching, hence the title ‘We make the Way by Walking’ not by subscribing mentally to certain truths. ‘If your faith seems to be a lot of talk without much practice, I hope this book will help you translate your faith to action’ (page xxiii)

Not so good

Page 9 ‘In the first creation story we learn two essential truths about ourselves…first, we are good’

This is not what I believe. Gen 1 clearly teaches that before the Fall, before Adam and Eve ate from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, we were good. But the tragedy of the fall is that Adam’s sin has been transmitted to the whole human race.

Page 10 ‘Every person…has value…bears the image of God! It’s all good’

This follows on from the statement in p9. Yes, every person has value and is created in the image of God, but no it isn’t ‘all good’. It’s been marred (not destroyed) by the fruit of the Fall, and sin.

Page 11 ‘If we eat from the second tree, we will soon become violent…to exploit…’

This does not consider the Genesis account that clearly states that we have been barred or exiled from Eden, from both trees! We do not eat of either tree. The truth is, however, that we are born ‘in Adam’ and therefore have inherited his sinful nature. We have eaten of the second tree by virtue of being ‘in Adam’. It’s a very present reality but not due to our fickle natures i.e. one day we eat of the tree of life and the next day the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. (See the early chapters of Romans, especially chapter 5)

Page 18 ‘We humans have consistently chosen the wrong tree’

As page 11. The choice on our behalf was made in Eden by Adam and Eve. We have inherited their choice and its consequences, it’s not our choice.

“ The sun doesn’t shine because I believe it shines”

Page 19 ‘They (Cain and Abel) soon become religious rivals, competing for a higher degree of God’s favour’

There is no evidence for this, only that God accepted Abel’s and rejected Cain’s. A fuller treatment of this is given in Edith Schaeffer’s Christianity is Jewish which links Abel’s sacrifice of a lamb prefiguring Christ as the Lamb of God.

Page 35 ‘The dominant theory of God in Abraham and Sarah’s day taught that…God who gave human life would also demand human…sacrifice. So when Abraham believed God was commanding him to kill Isaac…’

Whether or not other cultures subscribed to that theory, Maclaren’s inference re-tells the biblical account. The bible clearly states that God commanded Abraham to take the boy of promise up the mountain, bind him to the altar and kill him, only to be rescued from the act by the substitute ram caught in the thicket. Whatever Abraham believed or did not believe, God’s commanded it, and he obeyed. Maclaren weakens the testimony of scripture here to the point of contradicting it. The sun doesn’t shine because I believe it shines. If it’s shining, whether I believe it or I don’t believe it matters not a jot; it will still shine. The sun shining is not subject to cultural relevance, and neither is God.

Page 58/9 ‘Matthew’s version of this story makes a confession: Our ancestors, led by Moses and Joshua, believed God sent them into the world in conquest, to show no mercy to their enemies, to defeat and kill them. But now, following Christ, we hear God giving us a higher mission’

The problem with the Old-Testament-violent/angry-God versus New-Testament-compassionate-God comparison theory is that it fails under scriptural examination. Romans 11v22 ‘Behold the kindness and the severity of God, on those who fell, severity, but toward you, kindness’ is a typical New Testament scripture and sheds light on the balance in scripture from Genesis to Revelation. Under Moses’ and Joshua’s command, mercy and kindness was shown to all who opened their hearts to God’s purposes through them. Severity was reserved only for those who opposed Israel and came out to war against them. The forgiveness we have received in Christ only becomes ours as we humble ourselves and realise our need to be forgiven, then God’s merciful purposes can begin in our lives. If we oppose God’s purposes, we will continue to know the severity of God until we stop fighting, repent and believe. Then we encounter His mercy.

Page 78 ‘Most scholars today agree that at least three people contributed to the book…’

There are persuasive arguments for believing Isaiah was written by one author, Isaiah the prophet. A quick perusal of websites will confirm the popularity of both positions. So why does Maclaren declare the majority believe in three, Proto, Deutero, and Trito-Isaiah? I’ll leave you to work on this.

Page 110 Jesus taught that all of us could enter into that warm and secure parent and child relationship with God

Is it just me or do I detect a reluctance to use the words Father and son? John’s gospel opens with the possibility open for us to become ‘children of God’ through receiving Christ. But elsewhere the language of the New Testament is of God the Father welcoming us to be His sons e.g.

‘…bringing many sons to glory’ Hebrews 2v10. We are ‘sons’, and therefore inheritors, because God has placed us in His Son, whether male or female. There is no confusion here. Nor is there when all male believers in Christ described as part of the bride of Christ, not the bridegroom.

Page 181 ‘…God is gracious and compassionate and doesn’t need to be appeased through sacrifice’

Maclaren’s opposition to what has become known as ‘penal substitution’: Christ dying for us, taking upon Himself the punishment we deserved, is well documented. The specific problem with this sentence is Maclaren has put forward a false dichotomy…and I suspect he knew he had! Naughty! In other words, he is stating that graciousness and compassion are a direct contradiction to appeasement and sacrifice. You cannot, he proposes, believe in both at the same time. Really?

Good

Page 51 ‘Through the ten plagues we might say God got the people out of slavery. Through the Ten Commandments, God got the slavery out of the people’

If I want to be picky, I might not say God’s deliverance from slavery was a result of the Commandments, but the sentiment ‘getting slavery out of the people’ - is a point well made, and transfers well to the New Testament. Christ, as the Lamb of God, our Passover, so we are delivered out of our slavery to sin. We are redeemed from sin through His precious blood just as the Israelites were delivered from slavery in Egypt by daubing the blood of lambs on the lintels of their doorposts so that the destroying angel would ‘pass over’. But slavery was all the Israelites had known and so removing a slave mentality from the Israelites was just as important. The New Testament recognises this same battle: ‘You did not receive the Spirit of slavery again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption, by whom we cry out Abba, Father’ Rom 8 v 14

Page 116 ‘The word Christian is more familiar to us than the word disciple…to be alive in the adventure of Jesus is to…take the first intrepid step on the road as a disciple’

This aligns well with the title and the premise. It captures those early ‘they left their nets to follow Him’ moments in Galilee, the same moments as someone in our day and age opens their heart to Jesus. The start, not the destination.

Page 147 The whole of Chapter 26: Making it Real

The characters in this chapter are in conversation with Mary Magdalene who is telling them all about what she has seen and heard since following Jesus around Galilee. ‘We feel our hearts being drawn towards Him’ describes the progress of this conversation. Enough said. I found this quite moving.

Page 171 ‘Some people shame the poor…some shame the rich…Jesus doesn’t shame anyone, but calls everyone to a higher form of wealth and a deeper kind of ambition’

Who hasn’t been discouraged by such taunts as ‘lazy’, ‘stupid’, ‘selfish’, or ‘greedy’. Whilst these stinging words may be true, with Jesus they are the start of a conversation, not the end. Conviction can lead to faith, but condemnation only undermines confidence.

Page 174 ‘Anxiety doesn’t stop its dirty work at the individual level. It makes whole communities tense and toxic’

This quote is from Chapter 30, another good chapter, helpful in distinguishing between exercising good judgement – a healthy attitude - and judgementalism – unhealthy, causing anxiety in the person who has been consumed by criticism of others. Maclaren puts the love of God in front of anyone whose anxiety is caused by habitually judging others. Allowing the love of God to penetrate us is the way of escape.

Page 226 ‘When we gather, the Holy Spirit gives us different gifts to be used for the common good’

This is based on 1Cor 14v26 and an indication of the early Christians’ ‘normal’ experience of a church service. One we need to recapture?

Conclusions

If you’re keen to find out what Maclaren’s view is on the infallibility and reliability of the bible, or whether the bible can be said to be the word of God, this book will not answer that question.

Equally, if you want to know what Maclaren’s understanding of the crucifixion and resurrection, you’ll find a few clues and pointers but, again, this book is not the place to look.

If you’re looking for a book that can re-engage you with the person of Jesus and fire up your imagination so that Jesus leaps of the pages of the New Testament and speaks directly to you, then you may well enjoy this book.

Over to you!

Ps 23 Misunderstood but well-known (iii)

Lesson Three

He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his Name's sake

There is a sense in which we could respond to this verse with almost a dismissive Gallic shrug. If the Spirit is communing with our spirits, the result of which is flowing out through our souls and bodies to the world, that this is a statement of the obvious!

But that is to underestimate its importance. We can make a fundamental mistake when we’re in the clinch of lesson 2, when we need out souls restoring. If we’re not careful, the gospel is transformed into a self-help, self-improvement, self-healing project as if it is all about me. It becomes self-centred and not God-centred.

The Christian life is risky. As the Spirit re-writes our operating system - our spirits – by writing the Law of God on our hearts this will have a radical effect on what we do and what we don’t do. More and more, if we allow the Spirit to work in us, we start living more and more like Jesus who combined a message of righteousness with compassion.

Perhaps most strikingly we see this is how He dealt with the woman caught in adultery.

After her accusers had all left having failed Jesus’ test ‘let him who is without sin cast the first stone’ He turns to the woman and says ‘where are your accusers? Has no-one condemned you?’ and she answers ‘No-one Lord’ and he said to her ‘Neither do I condemn you’

We like to stop reading the passage at that point. But we know that Jesus went on to say to her ‘Go, and sin no more.’

And it will be like that for us. No-one is fooled. Sin is sin. It is destructive. Adultery is just one manifestation of sin.

Look at her first words: ‘Lord…’

The Lord is my shepherd.

And so as he reveals our sins to us, He does not do so to condemn us but to have compassion and to lead us back to the paths of righteousness.

The danger is still not passed for the disciple. Maybe we have had a period in our life where we have known the restoration of the Lord. Precious times. And maybe the Lord has shown us our sins and has led us back to the path of righteousness. Equally precious. We are not told in scripture whether the woman ‘sinned no more’. The immediate challenge for her would have been to end the relationship she had with the married man. Not easy, especially if she loved him. We don’t know the story. But life’s issues and the consequences of our choices are not trivial, they’re often intricate and profound.

But still, even if we’re living free from sin, we are still in danger of making the gospel all about its good news for us. The whole sentence end with ‘…for His name’s sake’.

When our souls are restored, and when we leave sin for righteousness, it is good for us, but there is a higher purpose other than our well-being.

The River Jordan flows into Lake Galilee then further south into the Dead Sea. The water flows down from Mount Hermon in Lebanon and, as we know from the New Testament, many of the disciples were fishermen eeking out their living from the shores of Lake Galilee; it teams with life, and fish. Fresh water flows in and out of the lake. Reaching its lowest point, the River Jordan continues on its path until it pours into the Dead Sea. But there’s no ‘out’. The water flows in and stops. As fast as the water flows in, it evaporates concentrating the salt content of the water, killing the fish. That is why it is dead, there’s no outlet.

If we treat what we receive from God, that cool fresh water of His Spirit to refresh and renew and restore our souls as simply for us, we will be just like the Dead Sea. What God has in mind is beyond us. His purposes are higher. We must become like Lake Galilee, water flows in, life is restored, and the same water, the same Spirit must flow through us to others.

The calling on Israel is to be a ‘light to the Gentiles’. In periods of history when they made it about themselves as the chosen people and turned in on themselves, the life that should have flowed to the nations ceased. When Jesus preached to his home synagogue (Luke 4), they were outraged as he picked out story after story of when God touched and blessed the lives of Gentiles through the lives of the Jews. They didn’t mind so much him proclaiming himself as Messiah but when He stated that the anointing was to reach out to the surrounding nations, that’s when the true condition of their hearts was revealed.

His name’s sake. ‘Sake’ means cause or purpose. In my childhood prayers in school assemblies often ended ‘…for the sake of our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen’.

It is only now that I am beginning to let those words sink in.

Running Blog - 6th August 2022

It’s one year and eleven months before the opening ceremony of Paris Olympics in July 2024.

Big questions persist over my participation.

Strangely though, despite, or maybe because of my latest setback, I am fortified and have that steely look sometimes – well, expressionless anyway – when I stumble to the bathroom and make the mistake of looking at myself in the mirror prior to shaving.

I’ve not only been feasting on the athletic prowess on show in Birmingham at the Commonwealth Games but enjoying feeling I have, at last, joined the athletic ‘community’ who prevail despite multiple injuries, Covid, and other pitfalls in life. It seems to be an athlete these days one must have a good ‘back-story’.

Mine continues; I suspect to be Anno-Domini’ related. I barely recover from one injury and then incur another. This week is a case in point.

Bad back followed by Covid out paid to any running until two weeks ago. My first recovery run was on July 23rd but ended up in A&E as reported in the previous post. Once the bruises subsided, I repeated the same course 6 days later July 29th…this time without falling over.

But I did feel a slight twinge in my left Achilles.

Four runs later and the ankle is in ice. It’s not good. Maybe I shouldn’t have even attempted to run yesterday but it felt better. Upon return though, clearly not.

So it’s ice and Ibuprofen. Am I frustrated? There are no words.

My back story may be enhanced but my running pace remains slightly below the required standard.

There’s still time, isn’t there?

Psalm 23 - misunderstood but well-known (ii)

Lesson Two

He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leadeth me beside the still waters; He restoreth my soul

We come to Jesus in whatever condition we are in. We might have lived an exemplary life or one full of suffering. We might feel we’ve been in control or out of control. But we somehow have realised we not only need but that God is offering us a heart transplant (see Lesson One).

And we find, maybe to our astonishment, that God is less interested in us living a religious life of prayer, bible meditation, and good works than we expected. Lesson One is to hear Him whisper to us ‘Lie Down’.

The purpose of lying down, apart from stopping any attempt to live the Christian life from our own resources, is to restore our souls. How wonderful. But what does it mean? What do we mean by ‘soul’? It seems a little nebulous. Something we think, or feel, we understand but not sure how.

In lesson one, we have seen that God has put a new heart in us. That means that He has given us a new spirit AND put His Holy Spirit in there as well. In New Testament terms we have become ‘temples of the Holy Spirit’ or ‘living stones’ or we are ‘hidden with Christ in God’ and so on. A summary statement that Paul often used is that we are now ‘in Christ’ and Christ is ‘in us’. Whichever picture we use we see our starting point in the Christian life is a Spirit/spirit operation, we have been brought into an intimate relationship with God in our hearts, it really is not about attempting to achieve some kind of religious holiness by observing some external regulations; it’s inside out.

God, then, via His Spirit touches our new spirit. Whatever is going on there then has to flow out through our souls and bodies to affect the wider world as well as ourselves en route.

Clearly, our souls are not our bodies, it is to do with the inner man. And our souls are differentiated in Scripture from our spirit. In Hebrews 4 we read that ‘the word of God is sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division between soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and a discerner of the thoughts and intentions of the heart’

Our spirit is where, in conjunction with the Holy Spirit, we commune with God and, more importantly, He communes with us. This is so against the general way of thinking in the Western World which places so much emphasis on ‘reason’ that Lesson One is so hard for us to fully grasp.

Our souls are our unique personality that differentiates us from others. It is made up of our minds, our emotions, and our wills. These are very precious and sensitive parts of our being and, by the time we come to Christ (and thereafter) are under God’s care and love. There is a wonderful verse in Romans that states of the Holy Spirit, that He ‘sheds abroad the love of God in our hearts’. It is the impact of that love on our souls that brings about any restoration that is needed.

Is it a quick fix? The more we learn to stop, and listen to the voice of God, and the more we allow God’s love to penetrate our souls, maybe the faster restoration can be. I don’t know how it works. I don’t know the timetable God has or even if He is worried about our sense of progress, but I do contend that the restoration of our souls is of great and sweet concern to the Lord. It is really simple. He loves us.

The Bible is very clear that His mercies are new every morning.

Treating Ps 23 in an ‘eternal’ fashion perhaps we can see that this restoration process can now come to the fore whenever it is needed. It is not restricted to when we first put our trust in Christ who said, ‘I am the good shepherd’.

Peter had left everything to follow Christ and yet he denied Christ three times. When the resurrected Jesus appeared to Peter on the beach He asked Peter three times ‘Do you love Me?’ That conversation not only restored Peter but propelled Him into the future. That’s the effect of having our souls restored; we’re alive again and can live once more in the world.

Book Review: Falling Upward by Richard Rohr

Introduction

Richard Rohr, a Franciscan Priest, and author, popular with Catholics and Protestants alike, spreads before us, in Falling Upward, a way of looking at true maturity, spiritual maturity, and how it can be embraced or resisted. He divides the span of human life into two halves: the first, the domain of younger men and women attempting to make a mark in the world, and the second half of life as a journey of increasing contentment brought about, ironically, through weakness and failure. Hence ‘falling upward’. The only way up is down.

My context

I’ve had this notion, maybe imaginary, from conversion to Christ onwards that God will bring certain books along at the right time. I would put Falling Upward in that category. It’s not as if I hadn’t heard of Richard Rohr – a friend I hadn’t seen for a few years visited out of the blue a few weeks ago and mentioned Richard Rohr, others in Wales who use the Enneagram to understand how individuals tick, and others over the past ten or so years have recommended Rohr. As often is the case, I’m late to the feast. The nail in the coffin came, as many good things do on my spiritual journey, sharing a pint at a local pub and discussing how the world works with PS, once we’d swapped vital family news, football, travel, and news from the world of work.

In recent weeks I’ve had the growing sense that in some ways I have packed my bags. I’ve written about this in a blog: Postcards from Abram where Abram has set out from Haran for Canaan in response to the call of God. In the early pages of Falling Upward, in fact the opening sentence, I found the same sentiment expressed: ‘A journey into the second half of our own lives awaits us all. Not everyone goes there, even though all of us get older.’

Green Pen

I read some books with a green pen in hand, making notes, ticks, underlining maybe, and placing references to important pages on some white space near the title page. I made 11 references for Falling Upwards, and six of these will form the basis of this review.

xxvi – ‘It is no surprise that…we speak of ‘falling’ in love. I think it is the only way to get there. None would go freely, if we knew ahead of time what love is going to ask of us…great love is always a discovery, a revelation…a falling into ‘something’ much bigger and deeper…beyond us and larger than us’

Rohr doesn’t disclose his own experience of this love, or his lack of it. Inevitably one wonders, since he is a Franciscan priest, and as such has forsworn romantic love. Nevertheless, he writes with understanding on this point, and, of course, the ‘love’ to which he is referring need not be limited to romantic love. His point is that to allow oneself to love another requires ‘faith’ – there are no guarantees; the only thing that is certain is that not taking that leap of faith with others cuts us off from any experience of love, it will always remain out of reach.

P12 ‘Theologically and objectively speaking we are already in union with God’

O dear. This was my first red flag. We have two immense words: theology and objectivity, as near neighbours placed in one sentence, plunged as it were into the magician’s hat, and out comes an extraordinary rabbit – union with God. Rohr, if nothing else, is an entertainer. I wonder what Rohr would make of the following New Testament passages which suggest the opposite: union is possible, and made available through Christ, but not automatically conferred. Like love, to experience it requires a leap of faith:

‘The true light (Christ) gives to every man who comes into the world…He came to His own but His own did not receive Him, but as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name’ John 1 v 9-12

‘Remember…you without Christ…having no hope and without God in the world but now In Christ you who were once far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ’ Eph 2v11-13

P36 ‘Very few Christians have been taught live both law and freedom at the same time’

This statement fits quite well with his overall observation of the negative effect on children (and therefore our first half of life) if we’re not given at least some structure (or law) to butt up against by, hopefully, loving authority figures such as parents or teachers. This is quite a complex but well-written argument. However, the radical nature of the gospel, once accepted, is that we are ‘not under law but under grace’ Romans 6 v 14. Paul’s letter to the Galatians expands on this even further. As Jesus stated: ‘Freely you have received freely give’. Grace means freely given. It feels like he thinks grace will be insufficient and that a good dose of law, or Jordan Petersen perhaps, is still needed for a Christian to live.

P49 Rohr quotes from Isaiah 38 ‘In the noontime of my life, I was told to depart for the gates of Hades, surely I am deprived of the rest on my years’ The ‘second half of life’ journey is open to those, he is saying, who willing to surrender everything that brought success and illusions of grandeur in the first half, and to embrace the priority of soul over external achievement. It seems a little trite simply to say Christ walked this path perfectly, but He did. All the miracles, crowds, and teaching were put to one side as He entered Jerusalem and the Garden of Gethsemany. He was reduced to: ‘Take this cup from me, nevertheless…not My will but Yours be done’ He was arrested, crucified, died, buried, and descended into hell. And then was raised. This is the hope, Rohr contends, of the second phase of life to be raised by falling upward. An excellent passage.

P86 This quote more or less follows on seamlessly from p49

‘The surrendering of our false-self…is the necessary suffering needed to find the ‘pearl of great price’ that is always hidden inside this lovely but passing shell’

This appeals to my sense of poetry rather than theology. The ‘false-self’ idea presupposes that our ‘true-self’ has always existed potentially inside us. He quotes Zen masters to make the point: ‘the face you had before you were born’. I think of Heather Small’s song with M People ‘You've got to search for the hero inside yourself, search for the secrets you hide, search for the hero inside yourself, until you find the key to your life’

This feels like a contradiction to God’s perspective on the human condition as prophesied by Ezekiel and Jeremiah.

‘I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes…’ Ez 36 v 26,27

It looks to me as if the pearl of great price has been made available to us through Christ but that we must ‘surrender’ all our hopeless attempts to produce it from within – that is ‘repentance’ – and receive this free gift of heart surgery to remove our hearts of stone and receive a new heart, gratis. (Note to self: order Annie Dillard’s ‘Teaching a stone to talk’ – quoted on p53. That’s the beauty of poetry, in one sentence capturing the essence of a thing by contradicting its reality, welcome to Paradox).

P68 I’ve put this quote out of sequence as the thinking contained in the quote from p86 follows on smoothly from p49.

‘Many Christians even made the cross into a mechanical “substitutionary atonement theory’ to fit into their quid pro quo worldview…’

This was one of Rohr’s least satisfactory passages. In order to tear down ‘substitutionary atonement’ he associates the substitutionary sacrifice of Christ with a world view that proponents of substitutionary sacrifice do not ascribe to, namely a ‘quid pro quo world view’. To brush aside substitutionary atonement may raise one evangelical eyebrow. Sadly the other is also raised when no thought-through alternative is offered in its place. It's one thing for a waiter to remove a bowl of cold soup, but not to return with another steaming away in its place is hardly satisfying. Come on Rohr, nail your atonement colours to the mast.

Favourite sentence

Part of Teiresias’s prophecy to Odysseus: ‘Your oar must become a winnowing shovel…you must fix the oar in the ground’

Conclusions

The acid tests are: (i) did I enjoy reading the book? and (ii) would I recommend it to others?

Despite my real concerns with his theology, yes, I enjoyed the book immensely. Whilst I may disagree over some fundamental theological issues, he is writing in an area of our human experience that is sorely needed. Who else out there is making sense of ‘life’? Shakespeare may have seven phases of life, but the simplicity of Rohr’s ‘two halves of life’ is as instructive as it is appealing. It sheds far more light than heat, provided you are willing to jettison your theological spacesuit and don one made of story-telling poetry. Would I recommend it? Yes. And I’ll need to re-read it at some point. He has a way with words; It’s richly written. You’ll be introduced to various cultures, poets, writers, and philosophers en route that you may not have explored before. Go and buy a copy, especially if you’re beginning to realise that the failures and difficulties you may have experienced in life might just prove to be stepping-stones for the future.

Things Fall Apart

Am I old when, from a distance, you see

Hair protruding from my ears?

Or when I smile at those I can’t hear?

Am I old when I can’t remember

Catching anything one-handed?

Or when two attempts are needed

To escape from a chair?

No, it’s when old barriers finally fall,

And, companion of tears,

You watch misty-eyed at

The shabbiness of old paint peeling

Painted with the one you loved

And falling into contentment:

Conversations with the mortal coil

Of secret memoirs, that feed the soul

And as you fall, you fall nearer to heaven

A series on Psalm 23 - well known but misunderstood? (Part 1)

Introduction and Lesson One

During my childhood, I learnt to sing one version of Psalm 23, Crimond. Since then some other versions have come along. Stuart Townend’s Celtic version is quite popular - an there’s always the Vicar of Dibley’s theme tune to avoid!

Whatever our preferences, anyone of my age is likely to be able to recite Psalm 23 and the Lord’s Prayer, if nothing else, from all the scripture read to us in school assemblies.

For the past five years or so, I have often been drawn back to Psalm 23. The rather dreamy, pastoral feel I had associated with Ps 23 has been somewhat uprooted and a fuller more dynamic version put in its place.

My first point.

The Psalm can be read ‘linearly’ or ‘eternally’. If eternally, each verse is like a musical instrument in an orchestra. Then, the whole Psalm becomes more like listening to the orchestra with one or two instruments at any one time taking the lead. If studying Ps 23 linearly, verse by verse, Ps 23 can be thought of as a life ‘assault course’, we will not emerge the same as when we started.

My second point.

Modern versions, like the NIV, or The Message, or NLT are excellent, but treat yourself, revel in the beautiful King James Version language. There’s something about the rhythm and phrasing that takes you far beyond the normal legitimate concerns we may have to ensure the accuracy of translation and higher, into the realm of poetry and song. After all, the Psalms are lyrics to 150 songs, many sung by the shepherd boy David in the often hostile environment of the Judean hills:

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures

He leadeth me beside the still waters.

He restoreth my soul:

He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies:

Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life

And I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

My third point.

Once we have grasped the Psalm linearly we can enjoy the whole orchestra or band playing a never-ending extemporary version, each verse emphasised at different times, speaking to us in new ways.

The Linear Version

Introduction

When Jesus, often called the Son of David, picked up the cup after supper he said: ‘This cup is the New Covenant* in My blood which is shed for you’.

• New Covenant can be translated New Testament; Old/New Covenant is equivalent to the phrases Old/New Testament

He was referring to the prophetic scriptures in Ezekiel and Jeremiah written many hundreds of years earlier and now fulfilled as Christ was taken to the cross and bled and died or us.

‘Behold the days are coming in which I will make a New Covenant with the house of Israel and the house of Judah…this is the covenant: I will put My law in their minds and write it one their hearts…no more shall every man teach his neighbour saying, ‘Know the Lord’, for they shall all know Me…’ Jer 31 v 31 – 34

‘I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you… I will remove the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. I will put My Spirit in you and cause you to walk in my statutes’ Ez 36 v 26,27 (also Ez 11v19)

To summarise, the Christian life is not one of trying to keep a set of external Laws inscribed, like the Ten Commandments, on tablets of stone, or to treat the bible as life-manual full of instructions, like an old Hayes car manual.

Open heart surgery.

The Jeremiah and Ezekiael prophecies indicate that God will do what we can never do for ourselves. He opens us up and works internally not externally. First our old hearts – which to God are like stones incapable of the life He wants us to know – are removed and a new heart, this time of flesh, full of life, is transplanted. This new operating system is an intimate joining of a new spirit with His Holy Spirit. That’s the conduit of eternal life to us. The Spirit then working from within writes the laws of God on our new hearts, therefore enabling us to live like Jesus.

This re-programming is a revolution. Religion is a human attempt to mimic God. It’s not a bad aim, we all have that urge within us, warped maybe by the distortions that being cut off from God brings through sin, but we reach out to God, often when we are desperate enough to admit ‘I can’t do this!’

In response to our cry, God sets up His tent in each of us and lives His life in our form.

The Lord is my shepherd.

Immediately we see Ps 23 is not primarily about us. David was out on the hills making sure he kept his father’s flock together, but why? They are being herded towards death. All of them. When John the Baptist called out ‘Behold the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world’ it was a clear indication that Jesus’ death as the Passover Lamb of God, was to be of profound importance to the whole world. Now, as Christ’s disciples, we are to be like Him.

That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death Philip 3 v 10

Any notion that the Christian life is all about God blessing us as if the whole of creation revolves around us is false. We are caught up in His purposes.

The ‘old you’, the ‘you’ with the heart of stone has been removed. The Christian life is not about gradually changing stone into flesh. No, the stony heart is surgically removed, and a new heart is transplanted in its place; it is a new spirit/Holy Spirit operation. It’s deep. It cuts that deep. The Christian life is run by the Spirit of Christ from within, joined to our spirit. We die to any controlling influence from our old life, just like the disciples who ‘left their nets’. What that means for each of us is highly individual.

‘I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who lives but Christ who lives within me. The life I now live I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave Himself for me’ Gal 2v20

We shall see, as the Psalm progresses the amazing economy of God that when we stop trying to make it about us, we get the blessing anyway!

I shall not want

Of course not! In any and every situation in which we are placed, the Shepherd has everything covered. Sheep often have to wander across rocky terrain temporarily with no food, but the Shepherd is always taking us on to the next spot of grass. Remember the purpose is not to have thin, unhealthy, injured, and lame sheep, we are to be presented in good nick. As good a nick as Jesus Himself. But there will be tough times when there’s no grass on which to graze.

He makes me down to lie

This is of supreme importance in the Christian life. Each believer has the life of God within. But we still retain the possibility of living from our misconception of personal responsibility; our thoughts, our feelings, or our decisions to do this or that. We are still foolish sheep who wander off. The bible is quite endearing in its various depictions of us as ‘silly sheep’. We can, if we want, still try and live according to our old ways of thinking and ignore the voice of God from within.

This is described in the New Testament as ‘fleshly’ or ‘carnal’ living, a spiritually immature stage we must put behind us as soon as possible. Let me try and illustrate this.

You might be in the habit of organising family holidays before you come to Christ. Before the open-heart surgery has been completed. You have developed a well-worn and successful routine. You decided ages ago to work through the vowels: Austria, Belgium, Canada, Denmark and next year should be E, maybe Egypt. But when you look at the brochures in January you feel uneasy inside. You don’t know why. You look at Egypt and all its history. You imagine riding a camel and visiting the Sphinx and so on. But another thought has arrived. ‘Ask the family about the vowels method’. Inside you respond: ‘But it’s worked so well over the years, Lord’. The Christian life is about hearing a new voice. It’s about losing every argument with Jesus. It’s about dying to our old ways. It doesn’t have to be about anything religious, it concerns the whole of life. It’s developing a more intuitive, sensitive ear to the Spirit.

Is He or is He not Lord? Is He or is He not your shepherd? If so, get prepared to be shepherded!

To ‘lie down’ is to give up rushing around when all God wants is for you to stop. It’s like Mary and Martha. Martha was rushing around trying to meet everyone’s needs. Mary her sister had ignored everyone’s needs for a while and chose to sit at Jesus’ feet.

‘Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her’

I feel sure Jesus spoke gently and kindly to Martha. It was something she had to learn. There’s a time for housework, for work of all kinds in fact, including ‘Christian’ work. It’s not that the work is wrong in itself, it’s just that we need to respond when God is speaking to us on the inside. Nothing else is as important. That’s the time to stop and down tools.

The Christian life is not, primarily about doing it’s about listening. Paul in Romans is not lying when he wrote ‘For as many as are led by the Spirit of God; these are the sons of God’.

Having Fun with Stereotypes…until

My father was born in Kentucky and my mother in London. After they married a tug of war ensued and, following a few years in Geneva, my mother’s wishes prevailed, and they settled in Kent. I appeared on the scene during the Kent phase. Deep in my psyche, if not my DNA, I find myself floating somewhere close to a mid-Atlantic identity, despite my British Passport.

I’ve reflected in recent days on the slowness of Jesus’ disciples to cotton on to what they had gotten (I wrote ‘got’ but US Grammarly corrected it to ‘gotten’, so gotten won the day) involved with following Jesus. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, and we can chuckle at their stumbling attempts to get a grasp, on Jesus’ message of the kingdom of God, even though they were with him for three years.

‘Hollywood Jesus’ wears a white tunic, looks steadily at the world with piercing blue eyes, is permanently unruffled, always ready with a clever comment, and the Hollywood Pharisee’ is a simple and unpleasant individual. The Hollywood stereotype proves to be a poor lens through which to understand what was truly at stake.

But to return to the British and America.

The British are forever obsessed with goodness, moral purity, reputation, and integrity. We fail, of course. But ‘standards must be maintained’. In England, this is as true for keeping one’s elbows off the table as it is for avoiding sexual or financial impropriety, and culprits who publically fall from grace are routinely drowned, especially if they were foolish enough to be caught. Far better to keep your dirty linen drying indoors.

Americans, however, are obsessed with success, in all areas of life. Anyone who fails is weak and eliminated from the race. Disregarded and put out of sight if not completely out of mind. Failure to turn the American dream into reality is the definition of human failure.

But, put a Brit and a Yank in the Kingdom and watch what happens.

The Brit will cling to Jesus because He is the hope of restoring true goodness. The Yank however will see in Jesus a greater source of faith for success. In Britain, the testimony is maybe of someone who has given up drinking to excess, in America it is how God has blessed their business, or their athletics, or their family.

Well, I did tell you this was an exercise in stereotypes. Bear with me.

I have, it seems, more in common with Moses than I thought. His father, a Levite, and therefore a Jew, was living in Egypt and so Moses was brought up in a foreign land. And that’s where the similarities end! He then became a Prince in the house of Pharoah and murdered an Egyptian who was mistreating one of his fellow Jews. His divided loyalty had well and truly come to light: Egypt and Israel vied for pre-eminence in his soul. The murder having been witnessed, he had to flee to the desert to spend 40 years in Midian with Jethro, his father-in-law, before a day arrived that translated him far beyond his issues with personal identity and history, and failures.

‘And the angel of the Lord appeared to him in a flame of fire from the midst of a bush. The bush was burning with fire, but the bush was not consumed…and God said…’Do not draw near…take off your for you are standing on holy ground’’

Moses was drawn into a completely new dimension, of the heavens, of unlimited glory, of the awesomeness of God. Radical change, therefore, was inevitable: he left the desert to confront Pharoah and thereafter we know about the plagues that led up to crossing the Red Sea on dry land, and, finally, the Exodus.

When Moses reappeared in Egypt, he would have faced stereotypical comments ‘O here comes the Jew’ ‘Who is this man that he should rule over us?’ ‘He’s a murderer’, and so on, as if any such statements convey the truth. It was the same for Jesus ‘The Messiah? He’s just a carpenter’s son. Who does he think He is?’ And it was the same for the disciples: a tax collector, some fishermen, a Zealot, and other Jews with no significant occupations. First, they watch him perform miracles, draw crowds, in debate with the Pharisees. Then they are sent out with the same authority, and report back, amazed that the sick are healed and dead raised just the same. And then they gaze on helpless as this seemingly invincible Man suffers the indignity of arrest, torture, and a lingering death on the cross, only to appear to them three days later eating fish but with gaping holes where the soldier’s spear had pierced his side.

Baffling as though these events proved to be for the disciples, a month or so later they are drenched, baptised in the Holy Spirit, with ‘power from on High’, and are speaking in other languages, Peter preaching the gospel to thousands in Jerusalem at the Feast of Pentecost, and the church is born. The crowd, none of whom knew Peter and the other disciples, witness them, just like the burning bush, with tongues of fire on their heads and yet not consumed, preaching about the Messiah who has risen from the tomb.

From that point on any stereotypes are inadequate. ‘Tax-collector’ fails to describe Matthew. Peter and the others are no longer fishermen. The zealot – a man who believed the only way to liberate Israel was to oust Rome militarily – is now preaching the gospel to Jews and Gentiles, including Romans.

For the Brit who is in the kingdom and still too concerned with his personal holiness, he must drop His guard and let Jesus, who he knows as Saviour and Lord, also be the Baptiser in the Holy Spirit however un-British that maybe. True Christianity is more than hymn books and dressing up on a Sunday, it’s more than pews, choirs, worship bands, it’s more than deacons, elders, churchwardens, priests, or pastors, it is as unpredictable as the wind or the rain. Truly we need to be like seed and be willing to let our ‘identity-kits’ our ‘stereotypes’ fall into the ground and die, or we will remain alone. Jesus isn’t British.

For the Yank, at least you know you must be baptised in the Spirit, and that it is just as important to know the baptism in the Spirit as it is to know Jesus as Saviour and Lord. But the baptism isn’t for your success. It’s more than ‘you’, dare I say it, it is more than ‘God bless America’. You will need to fall into the ground and die or you will remain alone. None of this ‘my church, my ministry’ talk is important, in fact, it will get burnt up in the flames. There is only one church. It is His church. It doesn’t need a building. It doesn’t need a budget. It doesn’t need to pay more than the next church to get a better pastor. It doesn’t need the best sound system, or the young people won’t come. Jesus isn’t American.

We all love having fun with stereotypes. And we must. At least then we know that, in lampooning others, we are lampooning ourselves. But there is something beyond even the lampooning, and it is the wholly ‘other’ dimension in which God is, which takes us far beyond any identity that has accrued over the years in our British, American, or any other culture, even if there’s some value in their standards and their hopes and dreams. True Christianity is Jesus-led, is Spirit-led, is the Father in Heaven-led, not tradition-led, not Pastor or Vicar-led, not ‘we do it this way’-led. It is not bound by the stereotypes that we think of ourselves or others. It is beyond all that – even if our initial experiences are not as dramatic as a burning bush or having flames on top of our heads.

they left their nets

Where to start? It’s simple really. If you are hearing in your heart Jesus calling you to ‘Follow Me’ you’ve already started. Moses took off his sandals. The disciples left their nets to follow Him. You know what it will take, what you need to leave behind. But that’s where it starts. Not with ‘going to church’, or ‘reading the bible’, or ‘praying and singing hymns’, or even ‘my ministry’ if you’re already in church, and certainly not ‘trying to be a Christian’.

Jesus said ‘My sheep know My voice’, that’s all we ever need to know, really. Everything else will follow on quite naturally/supernaturally once we respond.

Running Blog 23rd July - ended in A&E

I’m sure you’ve heard the same wise voices as I have, sharing their miserable theories that running is bad for your health and we’d be far better off sitting in an armchair eating olives and attempting 3-across on the Times Crossword?

After this morning’s ‘Recovery Run’ I can feel their supercilious smiles and ‘told you so’ eyes sparkling away. I should explain.

The day started so well. I woke up at 5 to a very still and bright morning. Running kit on. Fitbit watch strapped to my left wrist. Satsuma for afters. Water and towel. Car keys. Ready to go. The drive across the deserted Downs and down through Hotwells to my usual parking slot at Cumberland Basin was uneventful and calm; I was lost in my early morning thoughts.

Setting off in the sunshine, I decided to take the clockwise route around the Harbour perimeter. One or two dog-walkers were up but, otherwise, no-one else was around. From the sky I could hear loud whooshes from a hot-air balloon and all was well.

A mile or so from the start and I am running on a straight path with no obvious obstacles, no steps up or down. Sunglasses are reducing the glare from the dawn sun low on the horizon, then Bang! I tripped over something, maybe a loose paving slab, I don’t know, and I’m falling. In less than the second it took to hit the deck I remember thinking ‘O no this is going to hurt!’ not due to falling but having to break the fall with my left arm which is currently troubled by serious bursitis in the shoulder. The last time I had to extend my left arm to grab a handrail I was on the floor in extreme pain. Maybe therefore I didn’t extend the arm, or couldn’t, but before I knew what was happening, I’d cracked my forehead on the pavement and was rolling around feeling rather sore.

Recovering, and leaking blood from my head wound with drops of blood falling on the path, I tried to stem the flow with my nice blue t-shirt…and, yes, I can confirm red + blue still = purple!

Somewhat shocked I got to my feet and walked and ran past the few others up early with ‘You should see the other guy’ comments ready should anyone ask. But we’re British, and no-one noticed, or, if they did, they didn’t enquire.

An hour or so later and after calling 111, I ended up in Southmead hospital A&E. The NHS nurses were professional, attentive, listened patiently to my ridiculous story, and – thankfully – used a local anaesthetic (thank you!) before cleaning out the various cuts and abrasions and the mess above my left eye and wielding needle and thread.

Will I take to olives and newspaper crosswords? Watch this space.

So far, my prep for Paris 2024 is yet to be as boring and methodical as perhaps I’d prefer - far too much drama.

On The Sunset Side

It is late; in the afternoon

The quiet of the morning,

Lost in the day,

Has returned

And the clouds break apart

Welcoming home

Their hero on high

The sycamore is full of light

On the sunset side

Watching rich colours appear

And the sky darken

Once again.

Low horizon light

Illuminates my desk and pen

Where does light come from?

The seeing of a man?

No other creature has eyes

Like a composer on heat

Or the rap artist

Pouring his river of rhyme

Over an adoring crowd

‘In His image’ some say

And who can argue?

Are we abandoned, then,

Like Chinese lanterns

Detached and unmoored?

Or are we portals

For another realm?

Light of the morning

Light of the evening

Fall on me

Let me love the shadows

The dents and hollows

The imperfections

In us all.

Running Blog 21st July 2022

When I’m Sixty-Four

It seems starting a running blog at the age of 64 is faintly amusing. In fact starting anything at 64 is likely to produce wry smiles from those of insufficient years to understand that underneath this 64-year-old exterior lies a 17-year-old lad who plays rugby one day, kayaks the next, has a full round of gold plus a hot curry, gets up the following morning, and sets out on a leisurely 10 mile run in the sun, with his shirt off, just to increase his sun-tan.

The exterior reality is, shall we say, different.

Difference number one: be careful how you put your running shoes on. Leaning over and pulling on the laces might put your back out – again. Number two: yes, make sure you’ve done a number two before heading out, especially for a longer run. Number three: remember, nerve damage in toe on left foot limits the run to 10K. Number 4: you’ve just recovered from Covid, before that a bad back after sneezing put it out, and before that a muscle tear in the right calf…so maybe a very slow 5K.

And off I go. An hour later.

I don’t think I look too embarrassing. The shorts, black, are appropriately long without looking trendy and my shirt, black breathable fabric, is modest but not from the 1970s unlike my 17-year-old inner man. I’ve learnt not to pull up my short socks, somehow that would look silly, and does. But I do have outrageous orange shoes and I’m proud of the fact that the link to a more rebellious past isn’t completely broken.

Early morning - quiet

It's 6 a.m. and I’ve driven up to the scorched and tanned Clifton Downs and parked in the shade. It’s 6 a.m. because, despite retirement, my body seems to have a secret alarm that goes off at 5 or 4 but rarely 7 or 8. The advantage to me is that I can run without having to trip over other groups of athletic younger things and their training camp exercises, or battle through the earnest Nordic walking crowd with their ridiculous ski poles, struggling along on level ground (Yes, I know. I can hear you whispering…'with your bad back and feet maybe you should be stop running and start Nordicking?’ Over my dead body...is my presumptuous reply).

Freedom is leaving your poles by the nearest tree

The sun is up. I do my stretches. Careful! Manage to survive those and set off. It’s warm already, and quiet, just the swish of impressively fast bikers on expensive racing bikes and padded lycra. The early morning sun means I’m running into my long shadow and I wonder if the Nordic walkers will overtake me chattering away about health and wisdom, I’m running very slowly.

At the top of the first small rise, I can feel my heart rate and breathing are different to when I’m slouched at home writing a blog. Press on, down to the lookout point where you can peer down on Clifton Suspension bridge to your left and along the Avon to Shire, Pill, and beyond to Avonmouth...and buy ice cream later. I don’t stop. Before long I’m running back up Ladies’ Mile Road, past the Water Tower, and around to the long slightly downhill stretch to the small crossroad where all the camper vans are parked with their two fingers raised at the parking restrictions, and I’m back at the car. It’s a 5K route.

I am so very happy to have finally gone out for a run. I don’t care a hoot that I could have been overtaken by unidexters, frightened slugs, or slowworms. I have completed a 5K in glorious early morning sunshine, my back’s OK, my legs can still operate the accelerator and brake, and I didn’t stop.

Right at the end of my jog, just along from where I parked the car is a tree stump, the council having felled the diseased tree before it took out a whole set of Nordic Walkers or pedigree dog-walkers. From this stump I can now see a small branch sprouting a bunch of very healthy looking green leaves. It makes me think of all those of us whose lives are curtailed and restricted in some ways, even nations that decline and lose territory and identity…but not completely, and seemingly from nothing, from the apparent end, against all the odds, recover and the first shoots of recovery are seen.

In a very small way, that’s how I feel after so many weeks of looking plaintively at my orange trainers lying by the front door, and the shorts and shirts redundant in the drawer, simply to have jogged very slowly round the Downs.

On a larger scale of course, if one knows a few bible passages, is this from Isaiah 11: ‘A shoot will come up from the stump of Jesse; from his roots a Branch will bear fruit’ a passage that weaves together history and Messianic prophecy. Just for the moment, though, I’m going to drink in the hope, that this 5K is like a new shoot.

From the stump of Jesse…

Paris 2024 isn’t far off, I better get training.

One Red Line

In the waiting minutes

Working at the old table

With its creaking screws

I use up the time

Supping builders’ tea…

…One red line appears:

On are hauled the boots

And, stooping under the low-lintel,

The garden gate open,

I press my foot on the forest floor

On tanned autumnal leaves

Crisp and curled

From the heat of high summer

Like tinder ready to burn

Reaching for a second life

Nodding past the outsiders

I ship no accusing looks

Suffer no shouts of Unclean

My Covid sentence served;

A prisoner welcomed home

Like the Sons of Adam

Wandering the Earth, infected

Waiting for the soldier’s spear

Running with water and blood

Set free by one red line